My daughter is the love of my life. I had my daughter Nailah in my third year of Uni which was a really trying time for me what with being a pregnant student, her father leaving me and all the pressure of keeping up my grades, it was a lot but we made it and on the day I first held her in my arms (as the doctor was still stitching me up) I promised myself that I will do anything in my power to give her the best life possible. Raising her has been the biggest learning experience of my life. Watching her grow from an infant to a toddler to a preschooler and now she is already done with class one and headed to class two in January. Each day she learns and teaches me something new and I feel privileged to see her grow into her own unique person.
As a mum I tend to want to do everything that pertains to my daughter and this leaves me so tired and worn out. Throughout the years I have learned that it is okay to let people (by people I mean mostly my mum) help me and that it is not a sign of weakness. In turn I find that I am less stressed and calm and I can be a better mum.
I recently attended my daughter’s school prize giving day and end of school year parents’ meeting and a psychologist spoke to us and one of the things that she said was that parents need to spend at least 30 minutes a day with their children without any interruptions just some one on one time giving them all your undivided attention. Since that talk I have tried to make sure that every day no matter how tired I am when I get home before doing anything else I try to spend some time playing, reading with her, going for walks or even just sitting with her and talking and I have found she is much happier when I do that.
When it comes to chores now that she is 6 years old Nailah wants to help more around the house. Whether it is helping me cook or helping me wash clothes, of course her interest wans as quickly as it comes but I always try and teach her how to do something when she asks me to. For instance last week I was washing clothes and she came to the bathroom where I was with her little bucket and asked me to teach her how to wash clothes. So I put a pair of socks, some water and soap into her little bucket and showed her how to scrub the dirt out. She was so happy and so eager to learn and to help me. When she was done with the pair of socks she felt so proud of herself and of what she had accomplished and I felt happy as a mum that I had helped her gain that sense of accomplishment.
As I stated in the bio I am an environmentalist, whenever we can a group of my friends and I go around to different schools in Nairobi to plant trees and teach the students the importance of taking care of our environment and protecting our trees and natural resources. Whenever I can I like to take Nailah with me on these tree planting trips because I feel like it is never too early for her to learn about issues as important as environmental conservation. One time she even got to plant her own tree, she was so excited and happy, and now she’s more conscious about the environment and she’s even sharing with her friends and school mates the lessons she’s learning.
She is also developing a love for animals and loves to pet and feed animals. In August we went to visit my grandmother and there was a calf that had been born and Nailah absolutely fell in love with him wanting to feed him and play with him and pet him. Watching her love animals so openly without fear or reservations is just inspiring especially to someone like me who fears cows and likes to stay as far away from them as possible (bad accident with a bull when I was young made me very fearful of cows)
Motherhood I have learnt is a learning process. Every day raising Nailah teaches me something new, whether it is learning to be patient, learning to be more in the moment, learning to appreciate the little things in life or even learning to be more open and vulnerable, her outlook in life and how she perceives things is just so refreshing. She teaches me lessons that I don’t think I would ever have learnt had I not been her mum. I love watching her grow and I pray that I get to see her grow more and more each day and that she continues to teach and inspire me.
My name is Lorraine Asige. I am a mum to a beautiful 6 year old girl from Nairobi, Kenya. I am the author of the ‘Rosie’ series of children’s books. I am also an environmentalist and a blogger.