Surviving Homeschooling by M. J. Silva
Image by Jessica Lewis
Are you already on the verge of ripping your hair out because you're homeschooling? I got you!
Are your amazing kids showing resistance and wanting to do everything BUT schoolwork? Ohhh we're definitely in this together.
One of the first things we need to keep in mind is that no child was born to be sitting down for too long. Kids need movement and if they can learn while they’re moving, it will help them and you have fun while you both learn. Yes. Homeschooling is a two way street. Sometimes the teacher becomes the student. And embracing that fact will get you half way through.
Keeping the usual routines and rules as if kids were at school can be a challenge. Scratch that. It is a huge challenge. It's almost as if rules and routines were a thing of the past. So if you can let go of strict routines that kids have while they were out of the house at school, things will be better(ish). For kids they are home. School is the outside world. Whereas home is their shelter. Home is where our kids (hope/ search/ look for/ expect to) find safety, comfort and love. Many mothers I talk to are finding themselves on a wild rollercoaster while their children want to do everything except schoolwork. We must realize that it's easier(ish) for us adults to make that separation than it is for children. Especially when they are littler. My son has told me several times: "Mom, this is not school. This is home". And he's so right. So being flexible, understanding and compassionate will help everyone keep their (and your) balance. (Easier said than done, I realize.)
Here are a few tips (I have tons more) for you to try while homeschooling your children.
Listen to your child. And allow them to choose when and what exercises they want to do first. Keeping a schedule as if they were at School might work for some kids but definitely not for others. And be prepared for it not work the same way everyday! Which takes me to tip#2;
Lower your expectations. This one is a must. Remember that kids are not machines or mini me's. And some days they feel better and more motivated than others. Other days they just want to do their things. And that's super understandable. Some days their more excited about the activities than others. Forcing or nagging will only create friction and power struggles. So being extra flexible is key. Kids won't learn more if they're forced to do school work. Don't give in to the pressure of delivering subjects, activity sheets or fill their time. Remember that children have their own interests and natural talents and knowledge that they need and must explore.
Children work better in a fun environment! And if they can do school work in nature or in a place they choose instead of sitting at a desk, better yet. Some days (not to say most days kids will want to do things other than schoolwork. Have u mentioned that?) For them, they're home where they are usually free to choose what they want to do with their time. So patience and understanding is key.
Use motion and movement as much as you can to convey the subjects. As play is a child's natural element, using motion means to incorporate fun into schoolwork. And that is key for a more natural learning. Remember that children alreadh know a lot of things. Become a learner and let them be the teachers. You'll be surprise with how much they can teach you and the fun you both can have!
Don't get mad if your kids don't get the exercises right. Expect big feelings. When your kids are doing an exercise and they don't get the right word/letter/sentences as expected, refrain from telling them that "it's wrong" or "we need to correct it". If you notice that they write a letter instead of another or a number instead of other, simply tell them: "what a great effort!" If they ask you to correct the exercise or ask you "can you see/check if it got it right?"- let's say in a math exercise, even if your child didn't get a number/letter/word/answer right , you can say: "well that's fantastic, look at the amazing effort you had doing that. It was a challenge but you didn't give up! That's amazing! We just need to transform that "a" into an "e" ( for example). The word transform is magical for them to hear. Learning is a process so in my view in learning there are no wrongs or rights. In Learning there are no mistakes. Just transformation when the information doesn't come across or the results don't show as expected.
If you need to explain an exercise or activity, explain as many times as they need to understand what they have to do. Great teachers are mentors and they explain things infinite times if they have to.
Prepare for them to want to do everything except school work. Have I mentioned that??? Try to let that go. The most important is that they don't lose interest for learning. Always keep that in mind!
Let your children have big -make that huge! - breaks and be in command of their time as much as possible. And in those breaks they can go for a bike ride or a stroll or a walk. Something that they love to do. Be prepared for them to loose themselves in playing with the things they usually play with at home. And let them explore and play with things they love to as they would if they were at school. One day at a time. Remember that school is important. But not vital. However self taught skills are of prime importance in my view.
Be prepared to not have time for yourself as you (try to) manage and balance your work, helping your children and running a house. Make every second you can breathe or laugh (or cry) count.
Make sure you don't become a walking rule book. Our children need connection and love more than anything in this time. At all times, really. So again consider being flexible when it comes to school work, (if not everything gets done it's ok! Repeat with me: it's ok!). Don't forbid them to do things that they love the most because of school work. Let your children explore what they love and are passionate about the most. And be prepared for some work to be left out to do. And be ok with that. Don't ruin your relationship with your children because of school work.
Restructure your priorities and remember that children are children.
Tips for exercises: using motion and movement to incorporate the subjects: for example use a rope to jump and say the times tables. You can also build two dice with two boxes, throw them on the ground and multiply the dots/simbols that appear on the dice -for example- say the result out loud and then jump the number of times. It's super fun and kids love it! You can use the jumping rope for verbs, poems, other languages for every kind of memorization. Another amazing game is to jump steps to count frontwards and backwards.This is great for adding and subtraction: 1 foot in front of the other is 1, a larger step is 2, a larger step with a clap is 5, 1 jump with both feet is 10, 1jump both feet and a clap is 20, 1 scissors movement is 100. Then when you want to add, jump frontwards, when you want to subtract jump backwards. It's so fun and amazing for coordination as well as math.
Embrace children's natural curiosity and answer or research the answers they are looking for. And it's ok to answer "Thats a great question, but you know what? I don't know, we can always research. And we can do that now if you want."
Most important at this time- as well as others- is for children to feel loved and not feeling that they have to do school work to please us. They should do it because they're passionate about learning and not because they're forced to do the work. Prepare for two steps forward and one step back. Multiple times a day. Be flexible. Children are children. And most of all they need love, our attention and felling valued and heard. But most of all they need to feel free and loved as much as possible. Even if schoolwork doesn't get all done.
Follow M.J.'s Instagram and YouTube channel and Check out her 1 minute fun math and 1 minute fun grammar, connection Storytime, and other fun online activities, workshops and courses to do with your kids. For every book purchase, new follower or enrollment on M.J.'s workshops or courses, M.J. will be planting a tree or a plant on her new #seedsoflove project/movement. You can email M.J. at: kidsdontmisbehave@gmail.com if you need any help or additional information on how to cope with homeschooling challenges.