Beau's Birth Story by Sarah

If you speak to anyone that has ever asked me about having a family and birth they would tell you I was 100% having a c section. I didn’t want to feel the ‘pain’, so naive that no matter what way you bring your baby into the world there is pain, challenges, changes to your body, recovery and at the end of the day it doesn’t matter what way it happens once your baby is in your arms. 

I have been with my partner Luke for 14 years and we have spoken of children over the years on many occasions and I never thought I would opt for a vaginal birth, let alone a birth with minimal pain relief however that’s how my experience unfolded. 

I had a friend tell me of her experience with the midwifery group practice which is a beautiful program at Flinders Medical Centre where you are looked after by your allocated midwife vs doctors throughout your entire pregnancy and post-birth. You had to put your name down for this and a small group of women are randomly selected so you are lucky to secure a spot. 

I was allocated my incredible midwife Andrea who was the most wonderful support during my pregnancy and post-birth. I truly believe I had such a wonderful birth experience because of the relationship I built with Andrea. I trusted her and knew she would be there every step of the way. 

Leading up to my birth I was encouraged by my midwife to write down a few things that were important to me for the day understanding its best not to write a full step by step birth plan as it can go in so many different ways which can put a lot of stress on the mum. Instead to learn about the different scenarios that can come up and if there are specific things you’re not comfortable with, make that clear. 

During my pregnancy, I was quite unwell throughout vomiting several times a day most days throughout the pregnancy. In the early days, I struggled with this however it wasn’t long when I realised it wasn’t going away and learned to manage it. I remember one time being in the supermarket when I felt the rush coming, I quickly went to the checkout and then ran to my car. The feeling passed so I decided to start driving and vomited all through my car moments later which was delightful. I was also known at work for having mouthwash in my draw. One of the less exciting parts of pregnancy for me. 

From about 36 weeks I thought I was going to go into labour early having constant Braxton Hicks which lasted for weeks leading up to the arrival of Beau. I was told they are not painful therefore I was convinced based on how intense and regular they were that my body was getting close. Mentally I was convinced he was around the corner. 

When I hit 39 weeks, I was struggling but with ‘7’ days to go, I knew it was nearly over. Little did I know Beau wasn’t ready to join us earthside until 40+10. I finished work at the start of 36 weeks expecting he would be here really soon not knowing 6 weeks down the track he wouldn’t be here yet. 

I had a stretch and sweep where my cervix was still closed at 40+2, I had acupuncture multiple times, drank raspberry leaf tea, used clary sage oil, ate so much pineapple and bounced on a ball most of the day. I did everything that was recommended yet he still wasn’t ready to get moving. Goodness, that was a huge struggle. I was a happy positive person but when it was getting further and further past my ‘due date’ mentally I was struggling (and waddling around). I still went on big walks every day with my dog to keep moving.

I was booked in to be induced at 40+10 at 4pm, the emotions running wild after being convinced he would be here well before my due date. 

I remember the afternoon before going into hospital packing the final bits of my bags when I started getting contractions again. I put it down to Braxton Hicks as it felt exactly the same but they never stopped. I went into early labour that afternoon and it ramped up by 11pm. I stayed at home until about 8am the following day having called the hospital so many times overnight, but they said I wasn’t far along enough yet. I found that part at home really challenging. It was really intense and because you have no idea how dilated you are it is really overwhelming. I remember sitting outside first thing in the morning bawling my eyes out waiting for my partner to wake up. I let him sleep so one of us would have energy and it was the best thing possible following the birth. Radar my beautiful Labrador was however by my side the entire time at home and was so comforting. It’s incredible what your fur babies can do emotionally to help in times of need. 

We got to the hospital at about 8.30 and the staff said they have had to send people home because they were not dilated enough. (In this program as soon as you are admitted the clock starts and doctors have to take over after a certain period of time) Luckily I was 5cm so I got allocated to my room. 

Pre-pregnancy I was that person who said I would be having a c section or epidural the second I arrived at the hospital however after understanding that you are restricted to your bed when you have an epidural I wanted to try naturally first so I could keep moving. 

My labour was long, intense, challenging, empowering and beautiful all at the same time. 

I moved from the bed, to the shower, bath, ball, beanbag over the entire day working through each contraction as they came. I friend of mine gave me some wonderful advice before the day which was instead of being scared that another contraction is coming look at each contraction like you are one step closer to meeting your baby and you are a team working together. Every contraction in my head and/or out loud I would say to him we are one step closer buddy. It was a great way to keep my head in a good space.

A bit after lunch my midwife checked me again I had only increased by 1cm in 4-5 hours which was really deflating. All that work and nothing. By about 3/3.30 I decided to try the gas to see if that would take some of the pain away. After a short period of time trying the gas I said to Luke I’m going to be sick. They got me the vomit bags and I vomited for almost an hour on and off. They ended up giving me an injection because it wouldn’t go away and was getting really intense. I remember being on the ground on all 4’s vomiting so powerfully with so many tears feeling horrible. Once that finally stopped, I got in the bath which was so nice for about 10 minutes. I kept saying to Luke I have to go to the toilet, but nothing is happening, and I’m terrified I’m going to do a poo on my beautiful midwife while pushing. I knew that was common and a sign you are pushing correctly however I did want to avoid it if possible. I kept going from the bath to the toilet and back multiple times and finally I got the courage (so silly that I need courage for that conversation) to say to the midwife I’m struggling to go to the toilet. She said I’ll check you and then go to the toilet and just stay in there and it will eventually happen and if it doesn’t who cares don’t worry at all.

I got on the bed and can remember her huge beaming smile pop up, Sarah you are fully dilated you don’t need to go to the toilet, that’s your baby’s head you can feel. The joy that rushed over me, how am I 10cm! I didn’t even notice the transition stage when you're meant to turn into a ‘wild animal’ which we learned in the birthing class. It all happened whilst I was on the floor vomiting, so I didn’t even notice that stage which was amazing. 

The excitement between Luke and myself knowing we would meet Beau soon is really hard to put into words. I had listened to many podcasts and knew it was normal for the pushing stage to be between 30mins (if you’re lucky) and 2 hours on average for your first birth which I explained to Luke again.

We tried every position possible but nothing was working. 1 hour passed, 1.5 hours passed then we hit the 2 hour mark. I was exhausted and couldn’t get into a comfortable position that worked so they moved me from the midwifery group rooms into the medical rooms so I could use the stirrups. 

We tried for another 30 minutes and nothing. I was still running off adrenaline (it’s incredible what your body can do) however the doctors came in and said to my midwife they needed to take over. We tried for another 15 minutes and nothing. His head was too big. He was coming out and going back in. The doctors then said it’s been too long, they were getting really worried and we needed to discuss options. I was not prepared for this conversation mentally because we were so close however from a podcast I listened to I knew all the options so it was less intimidating in the moment. He said we recommend trying an episiotomy first because I’m going to tear if I go any longer and if that doesn’t work emergency c section.

In my head I thought how was this happening? After all that work I was going to have a c section. I was so frustrated but at the end of the day Beau’s health and my own was all that mattered. I turned to Andrea asking if she agreed which she did for the episiotomy. I firmly said no to forceps however was happy for them to do an episiotomy and use the ventouse (vacuum) if needed otherwise c section as last resort. 

Thankfully I had an episiotomy, they used the ventouse for some extra help and he was out within 15 minutes. 7.59pm Beau was finally born. I have to say the ‘ring of fire’ is next level. I remember being calm and determined throughout the entire birth process however during the ring of fire I turned to Luke (squeezing his hand so hard) saying ‘holy S, that ******* hurts so much. I remember one of the doctor’s popping her head up and saying ‘that’s what we call the ring of fire’ then popped her head straight back down. I remember looking at Luke with a big smile on my face and thinking of that Johnny Cash song in that moment which was a good distraction. Beau was 55cm 3.95kg and the doctors were all saying no wonder he wouldn’t come out he’s a big boy. Looking at the photos I wonder how on earth he came out.

Although it was intimidating going from a day with only Luke and my beautiful midwife to ending up in a room with at least 8 doctors and nurses everyone was amazing and made me feel so comfortable. Beau took a little bit to start crying which also freaked me out but that moment you hear that first cry is incredible and the joy meeting your little love for the first time is just beautiful. 

Leading up to the birth I had hand expressed a lot of colostrum and thankfully I had because I was so exhausted from the birth and not having slept for about 36+ hours. Luke let me rest and he got up with Beau throughout the night to finger feed him my colostrum, change him, settle him & bond with him which was really special to watch. (I had plenty of time with him before we went to sleep).

Although the experience was nothing like I had imagined in my head (thank you to the volume of horror stories people love to share when your pregnant) it truly was intense, empowering and beautiful. I managed to get through the birth with only the gas for a short time which I was so incredibly surprised about. Although reading back over my experience it sounds like it was a lot which it was, but I kept a positive mind for as much as I could throughout the day and I’m genuinely looking forward to the next one to see what I experience.

We were sent home the following day around lunchtime after we both were cleared however being in the midwifery group your midwife is at your house constantly and always on the phone checking in for the first 6 weeks. I had so much support from Andrea and my recovery was quite straight forward which I am very thankful for.

I am absolutely loving being a mum and watching my sweet boy grow, learn and change every day. 

Sarah, 30 years old had her beautiful boy Beau in September 2021. Sarah lives in the Adelaide Hills on a couple of acres with her long term partner of 14 years Luke, their beloved rescue Labrador Radar and now Beau. As a family they love spending time at their shack on the river with their friends and family.