Lose the Guilt: 4 Strategies to Ignite People’s Hearts with Communication by Anne Leedom

We often feel guilty when we don’t connect with others as we intended. If you are looking to create a tribe for your business, or with just one person, the concepts are very similar. Research shows motivation through guilt and the long standing 'convincing wheel' doesn't work in the long-term. It’s not effective with people one-on-one and not with large groups. 

Trust is what works. 

Authentic emotions build trust. In researching the platforms of today’s leading content experts, including Dr. Phil or Tony Robbins and resource experts like Dr. Oz or Oprah, as well as some of the most impactful and emotionally connected people I know, there is a common denominator. It’s true with authors, actors, singers, and people in every walk of life.

The ability to focus on specific emotions and to carve out your own core emotion or emotional messaging, and to build your communication around that heart-centered place is what creates massive connections over time.

Here are the 5 strategies that will move you from trying to convince others to buy into your ideas, emotions and thoughts, and to creating authentic loyalty and a powerful sense of belonging with your intended tribe.

1. Shift your Perspective. Start by asking yourself the most important question you will ever consider. What is your real intention? If it’s about simply securing a goal, that won’t get you where you want to go. Securing your overall goal is the result and not the intention. Your real intention should be focused on how people will experience their lives emotionally, rather than what they will do based on your communication. 

Information, regardless of if it's between just two people, a small group or a national audience, is far more well received once we experience profound trust and are secure that the communicator is truly invested and committed to our well-being. The academic approach will, in many cases convince people to follow your ideas, but alone will not typically build a long-term relationship based on loyalty and connection.

2. Step Back. Take the time to re-evaluate the emotional presentation and impact of your communication. Choose a few select words that reflect how you want to help others to experience their life, regardless of their circumstances. Once they feel a strong emotional connection with you, your ideas and credibility will be far more relevant. Be very specific and choose emotional concepts. Avoid words that describe a state. Happy is a state. Excited, content, satisfied, elated…these are emotional words. Emotions happen in seconds period and create a physical reaction. The stronger and more authentic your words are, the more you will create a unique and powerful presentation in your communication that will connect with people.

3. Life Bites. Create emotional bites, concepts and short quotes that represent your emotional messaging. As you build your communication style with your emotional message in front, people will begin to connect with you personally, and then to your ideas and thoughts. The more methods you have to communicate your message, the more people will remember it and identity the concepts with you. Examples of this are Dr. Phil’s “How’s it working for you?” or Tony Robbins’ “Live with Passion”. 

4. Assessment. Review how people are reacting to your new communication style and build on the messages and emotions that resonate the strongest. Focus on specifics to create a memorable and recognizable message. Authenticity is key. Catch yourself in everyday life. What do you say to people? As long as the response is consistent with your brand, you can let responses help direct your path to new communication and emotionally connected relationships.

People connect with people they trust. Trust stems from powerful and authentic emotional connections people can rely on. Both people and companies put a great deal of effort into determining ways to convince people to buy into their ideas. like a lawyer in a court room. They leave out the critical missing piece that everyone looks for on a day-to-day basis to build organic and sincere emotional connections.

Emotional connections are the soil that we can believe in to help guide us in our lives. It is this crucial difference that builds powerful relationships with profound impact and provides the opportunity to change millions of lives.

The more people feel, and the more they trust those feelings, the more they become loyal and excited supporters of an individual or company. It’s a universal concept. 

Take the time to learn the difference between emotions, states and feelings. As you develop your communication to resonate with the crucial aspects of each that you want to be known for, the potential tension, resistance and negativity will be far less apparent. 

Anne Leedom is the Founder of Leedom PR, a premier consulting and media placement agency based in California. Her unique strategies have helped thousands of individuals and companies create powerful relationships and impact millions of lives, and in many cases, just one. For more information visit www.leedompr.com