Postpartum: Teresa and Sarah's Postpartum Experiences
The Zen Mama Guide To Pregnancy, Birth and Beyond covers everything from the moment you decide to think about having a baby to fertility, pregnancy, pregnancy loss, birth, postpartum and beyond. Today we’re talking all things postpartum, Teresa and Sarah are sharing their postpartum experiences and we’d love to hear yours in the comments below!
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POSTPARTUM: SARAH
My postpartum experience with each baby was so different. How I felt versus how I looked and what I focused on varied with each birth. I think it is safe to say that with time and experience you do gain perspective but you can also learn that loving yourself and your body but what you have been through and accomplished is a pretty beautiful thing.
I remember in my first or second pregnancy turning to my husband and saying something like, “do you think I will ever look like myself again?”
I don’t think badly of myself for feeling this way or thinking this way, if you have ever been pregnant you will understand that your body goes through the most incredible changes that half the time you are blown away by what you are seeing and feeling right in front of you. So I don’t want to criticize that version of me for asking this question but I do want to acknowledge that I wish I had been gentler on myself during those moments.
Who I see and how I feel after having my babies is not the same person I saw before and I am grateful for that. I love my body and the way that I feel but mostly because I have met the needs of my body in this last pregnancy and I have taken care of myself in a way that I didn’t after my first two pregnancies.
After my third baby Winter’s birth, I was the gentlest on my body, my time, and my headspace.
As many of you have heard me discuss I did the first forty days at home and from there it set the tone for the first year of my postpartum. I followed how I felt at every turn. If I needed to stay more relaxed on a certain day, or felt like a walk, or needed more nourishment I listened to and asked for all of these things. There were days when Eric would take the older kids and I would stay home with the baby and rest. I would always make sure to eat nourishing foods and go for walks. Even though I wanted to work out regularly I would try and yet my body didn’t feel fully ready. It wasn’t until this summer when Winter was about to turn 1 that I felt like I wanted to start working out on a regular basis. Not only did that help me feel stronger in my body but mentally the hormone release has been amazing.
We always talk about meeting the needs of our little ones as the need arises and yet we completely ignore our own needs. Meeting your needs if it’s through exercise (not because you feel pressure to “Snapback”) but because you know it will make you feel good. Meeting your needs through nourishment, making sure you are drinking enough water, eating nourishing foods, getting sleep, and taking moments for yourself.
These are all things that not only will help you physically to feel good and strong but also mentally to feel balanced and present.
POSTPARTUM: TERESA
The postpartum body experience! After all four of my babes my body went through tremendous changes and transitions. After Bodhi I was shocked at how quickly my body dropped the excess weight as a result of breastfeeding. Within a week I was back in my old jeans and although softer and with a stretched out belly button (thanks to my 16 yo “must get my belly button pierced like the cool girls” self) it was the silver lining for me amongst all the other complications I was having. My recovery was HARD and I had to pee in a bucket of warm water every day for 3 weeks (thanks to a tear) I broke all the capillaries in my face from pushing, my eyes were almost swollen shut from no sleep/pushing so hard and I had to be gently helped up from the couch for two weeks because my bottom felt completely bruised and traumatised!
After Forest and the dreamy way in which he entered (hurrah no postpartum recovery this time- Water birth made ALL the difference for me) I did however feel quite depleted nutritionally and I got rather emaciated from tandem nursing. Later I found I was very anaemic. I had to work really hard to stay healthy, being very conscious to eat enough from nourishing fats and nutritionally sound food.
I didn’t feel like working out after Forest and essentially stopped exercising all together after I had both my boys, I was time poor and that was very low down my priorities list. I had a newfound love for my post baby body and while I no longer had a shapely bottom (it was swiftly replaced with a flat “mum bum”) and my figure was completely different, curvier in some places less curvy in others, I was in awe of all my body had done to birth these babies. Anytime negative thoughts started to circulate I would remind myself how lucky I was to be able to carry them and keep these little guys thriving in utero. What a remarkable gift to be given!
With the girls my body took longer to “get back” to its old self, I let the process be very organic with Poet, no working out and eating as I always did. This time round with Prairie I’m currently 3 months postpartum and I haven’t yet dropped all the baby weight, I’m my biggest still that I’ve ever been this far into postpartum and I have to say I feel completely liberated from the pressure to drop the rest of the weight. Recently I’ve felt compelled to hike everyday, I love the feeling of moving my body, eating healthy foods and nourishing myself with fresh air and good soulful podcasts as I walk. Its been a more active postpartum experience but gentle in the sense that I have been listening to my body and accepting that I may always carry these extra 8lbs of baby love around and I’m so good with that. In fact I find the squishyness to be a beautiful reminder of my pregnancy.
I think there is much less societal pressure to get back in shape these days as there once was, or perhaps what I’m feeling is really just an internal shift. As I age my focus is much less on the physicality of my body; the judgement surrounding my lack of core strength/six pack/KK butt and all the other things we have deemed to be beautiful. I take much more pleasure in listening to my body, resting it, bathing it, treating it with a kind of loving acceptance and celebration. I try to see through the lens of my children who look at every part of me adoringly, they don’t look at bumps, lumps, frizzy hair, softness or cracked nails as unattractive they just see mama, the person who they love, the ones who nurtures them and the body that they curl up on when they need comfort. That kind of innocence and purity is such a divine reminder to be gentle and kind to ourselves.