Tips and Tricks to Finally Find Out What Your Child Actually Did at School by Christina Less

‘Nothing!’ 

‘I can’t remember!’

‘It was boring!’

I think every parent has heard at least one of these responses when asking their child about their day at school.   Now, you might have a child or loves nothing more than telling you every detail about their day to the point where you wished you’d never bothered asking!  On the other hand, you have a child who doesn’t talk about school at all – they’re fine, they just don’t want to talk.  By reading on, you’ll find some tips and tricks to find out what has happened in the day and to strike up a conversation.

Questioning is key to this.  Asking a child ‘How was school today?’ is a nightmare to answer.  There are so many parts to a school day that some children don’t know where to start.  There might have been parts they enjoyed or didn’t enjoy; parts where they were praised or parts where they were told off.  There could have been a mixture of all 4!  

Focus on something specific.  ‘What was the best thing you did at school today?’  ‘What did you do during free time?’  You are now focusing on something positive and potentially fun.  The response then leads your conversation.  ‘What did (teacher’s name) say when you did that?’  ‘Do you think you can do that again tomorrow?’  If you are still struggling down this path, tell your child your answer to the question.  They might just surprise you and ask you about your day!  

Choose your moment wisely.  If your child NEVER talks on the way home from school, try a different time of the day.  “This could be over dinner or whilst popping to the shops.  This could be the game changer you’ve been after in terms of discovering what happens during the school day” says Jill Evans, a psychology writer at Eliteassignmenthelp.  Again, share your day to show with them!   

Knowledge goes a long way.  Does the school share a timetable or information about topics to be covered over the next few weeks?  Knowing when specific things are happening can be a great way to get your child talking.  ‘What did you do in art today?’ ‘Who was on your team during hockey today?’  These questions are specific but allow your child to answer with detail.  Asking a closed question will only offer a yes or no answer.  Avoid such questions as ‘Did you enjoy art today?’ or ‘Did your team win at hockey?’  Nothing useful comes from these questions if your child is reluctant to speak about school.

Don’t ask at all.  Now this might seem a bit of a strange statement but think about school from your child’s perspective.  They’ve been with dozens of different people, taken part in a variety of lessons and had their senses bombarded from all angles.  Would you want to be quizzed on your day after all of that?  On the journey home do or talk about anything that is not school related.  Race home, talk about sports, music, random news stories etc.  This allows your child to relax and recover mentally from their day.  Later in the evening, then discuss their day and yours.  

Avoid eye contact.  Another strange sounding tip but one that has been proven to work.  This is not look disinterested and get your phone out but a way of making a more relaxing atmosphere.  Someone looking directly at you after asking you a question can be unsettling and put you on the spot.  Ask your question, smile, and then face forward.  At appropriate moments make eye contact and keep the conversation going.  The occasional nod or ‘ok’ will show that you are listening.

So, there you go, some tips and tricks to hopefully find out a little bit more (or less) about your child’s school day.  Remember, not all children are the same so one idea might work brilliantly or not at all.  Also, today’s winner might not work tomorrow.  One final thing to note is that a child’s silence might mean there is an underlying issue that they don’t want to talk about.  Speak to their teacher if you have concerns.  

Christina Less (a social media strategist) writes for Australian reviewer on topics such as marketing news and technologies.  She is a social media strategist at Big Assignments and Student writing services.