Guide Your Child Towards a Positive Relationship with Food: 5 Tips Moms Need to Know By Kari Dahlgren

Every parent dreams of raising a child with a healthy relationship to food, one that lasts well into adulthood. Yet, in a world filled with fast food ads, diet fads, and ever-changing nutritional advice, it can feel daunting to set a supportive example.

To truly empower your child around food, it's crucial to look beyond just what they eat and also consider how they relate to food in a way that nourishes both their body and mind.

Here are five strategies to help promote a healthy, intuitive, and mindful approach to eating for your child.

1. Avoid Labeling Foods as ‘Good’ and ‘Bad’
Labeling foods as 'good' or 'bad' can create rigid eating attitudes that affect both children’s food choices and their social interactions. 

Research published in The Journal of Experimental Child Psychology found that children negatively judge unconventional food choices as harshly as they judge eating nonfoods like grass. This shows how early food biases form and reinforce a 'right' and 'wrong' way to eat.

By refraining from talking about food in terms of ‘good’ and ‘bad,’ you can encourage your child to make choices based on hunger and satisfaction rather than judgment. 

2. Lead by Example
As a parent, it’s easy to feel pressured to have a “perfect” relationship with food in order for your child to relate to food in a healthy way. However, no matter what stage you’re in, you can always lead by example by staying mindful of your dialogue around your kids.

Try to avoid talking about dieting or expressing guilt after eating certain foods. Even if you struggle with feeling guilty for eating sweets after dinner, guilt that you don’t deserve, by the way, avoid expressing it around your children. Otherwise, they may pick up on these cues and begin to associate eating with negative emotions.

3. Teach Hunger and Fullness Cues
Teaching your children to recognize their body's hunger and fullness cues is essential for a healthy relationship with food, allowing them to eat based on internal needs rather than external factors like time or food availability. 

Encourage them to discuss how their stomachs feel before, during, and after meals, helping them distinguish between eating from hunger and eating out of habit or boredom. 

To make this engaging, try simple activities like the "hunger meter" game, where each family member rates their hunger on a scale from one to ten during meals. This can be a fun way to teach and talk about hunger levels and what they mean.

4. Engage the Eating Environment Without Pressure
Another great way to empower your child around food is to avoid the 'clean plate club' mentality. When children are exposed to a variety of foods without expectations to like or finish everything on their plate, it encourages them to respect their own fullness cues. 

Also, try to stay mindful of the division of responsibility in feeding. Parents are responsible for deciding the “what, when, and where” of eating, while children decide “whether” and “how much.” For older children, you can even empower them with the “what” of eating within boundaries that you feel comfortable with.

5. Create a Positive Mealtime Atmosphere
Mindful, distraction-free eating is essential for both parents and children. Removing distractions like TV during meals helps everyone focus on eating and listening to their body's cues. Regular family meals are crucial, offering a time to model balanced eating and foster connection, which helps children feel secure. 

It's important to keep mealtime rules flexible to prevent pressuring children to eat when they aren't hungry. Allowing children to choose how much they eat from a variety of foods empowers them to manage their own intake, fostering independence and a positive relationship with food.

By adopting these five strategies, every meal becomes an opportunity to reinforce a healthy, intuitive relationship with food. With the right tools in place, you help set the stage for well-being that extends far beyond the kitchen table.

Kari Dahlgren is an eating psychology coach that specializes in a psycho-spiritual approach to stopping compulsive eating. She manages an extensive eating psychology blog full of evidence-based resources for feeling normal around food again. For insightful guidance, start by downloading her free ebook, The Spiritual Seeker’s Guide to Stop Binge Eating.