Teresa and Sarah's Top 6 Conscious Parenting Tips
We are getting so close to the release of the US edition of The Zen Mama Guide to Finding your Rhythm in Pregnancy, Birth and Beyond, which if you haven’t already purchased, you can here:
The book is filled with a wealth of information covering topics from Pregnancy, Birth, Postpartum, Pregnancy Loss, Babyhood, and Beyond! Including Teresa and Sarah’s parenting philosophies, gentle discipline techniques and tools, conscious communication and so much more. Below are Teresa and Sarah’s top 6 conscious parenting tips. We’d love you to add your tips and tools in the comments below!
TIP ONE
Meet the needs of your little ones when the need arises.
TIP TWO
If something doesn't feel right in your gut but you have read it in a book or "your parents used this type of discipline" or your friends’ parent this way... listen to your gut. Let your informed mama voice be the loudest voice you hear. Something that works great for some children or parents may not feel right or work great for you and your little one and that is ok.
TIP THREE
Get on their (your little one's) level. Make eye contact and listen to them when they try to tell you something or if they are having a hard time. It is so easy to get distracted or overwhelmed when littles are having a hard time or having a tantrum. Try getting on their level and helping them to regulate by showing them calmness, showing them that their emotions are not too big for you and that you are here waiting for them when they are ready to talk and take a deep breath.
TIP FOUR
Make sure your little one knows that all their big feelings are welcomed by you. It’s so easy to unintentionally shame them by trying to get them to stop being reactionary. Or “fixing” the tantrum in the moment. It’s easy to become overwhelmed and want it to just stop but we need to be their emotional regulators and for them to feel safe with us we have to encourage them to openly express their feelings no matter how large they are. You can say things like “I see how hard this is for you” or “I’m here ready to help you when you need”.
TIP FIVE
If your child is acting out physically you need to establish boundaries. Firm, clear words such as “your hands aren’t for hitting, I won’t let you hit” or “I can see how angry you are, I’m here for you but my body is not for hitting”, oftentimes you can wrap your arms around your child until they calm down. “I’m going to hold you until you can calm your body” your calm, clear energy can help regulate them. Once our kids have calmed down you can say “please touch me gently” so that they can connect that when we touch we do it gently.
TIP SIX
Noticing other children’s behavior around you can have a positive effect on your children. Say you’re at the park and another child is having a tantrum, you can say to your child “it looks like she is having some big feelings, what do you think she is asking for?” Listen to your child’s observations. You could also say “I bet a nice cuddle from her mummy, daddy or safe adult could help her calm down” it helps to build empathy and if they can recognize behaviors in other children they’ll soon be able to be more reflective when sitting in their own similar big feelings.